Wednesday, 2 December 2009
I married your mother because I wanted children. Imagine my disappointment when you arrived.
Stan: I wanted to see if the light switch was off.
Stan Laurel & Oliver Hardy in Helpmates (1932)
Stan: Say, what do you think I am? Cinderella? If I had any sense I'd walk out on you.
Ollie: Well it's a good thing you haven't any sense!
Stan: It certainly is!
Groucho Marx in A Day at the Races (1937)
Man: Are you a man or a mouse?
Groucho: Put a piece of cheese on the floor and you'll find out.
Jack Lemmon & Walter Matthau in The Odd Couple (1968)
Felix Ungar (Jack Lemmon): Funny, I haven't thought of women in weeks.
Oscar Madison (Walter Matthau): I fail to see the humour.
Robin Williams in Good Morning, Vietnam (1987)
Adrian Cronauer: I can't even make fun of Richard Nixon, and there's a man who's screaming out to be made fun of.
Robin Williams in Mrs. Doubtfire (1993)
Mrs. Doubtfire: My first day as a woman and I am already having hot flushes.
Jim Carrey in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994)
If I'm not back in five minutes...wait longer!