Wednesday, December 13, 2023

Clash of the Press Titans

If you simply enjoy humour, you will get this. If you're a part of the media, public relations or communications field, perhaps even more.

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One evening, Press Release and Press Note met in a bar. After a few drinks, Press Release, more cocky and boastful of the two, got up to leave. And then, a funny thing happened.

Press Note: "Where are you going?"

Press Release: "To shoot myself off to the media. I have several deadlines to catch."

Press Note: "Oh, that reminds me, I need to grab the media's attention, too."

Press Release: You? Seriously! A waste of time. You sit here, drink some more, and figure out who you are and what it is you do. Here, it's on me."

Press Note: "Hey, I know who I'm and what I do — you condescending jerk!"

Press Release: "Do you? Do you really?! I don't think so!

As Press Release turned to leave, Press Note, as boiling mad as a boilerplate, got off the stool and lunged at him. The two grappled and rolled on the floor. Headlines were torn, datelines were ripped off, quotes were shred to bits.  

Three journalists, drinks in hand, stood watching the feuding pair in the circle of cheering onlookers, some of whom were placing bets.

"There's our front-page story," one of them said, whipping out his phone and taking pictures.

"Yeah," replied another. "I can see the headline: WORDS FLY AS PRESS RELEASE AND PRESS NOTE CLASH IN HILARIOUS BAR BRAWL"

"Wonder who's gonna issue a press statement," said the third.

© Prashant C. Trikannad

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